In the book of Matthew it tells us
"Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted" Matthew 5:4
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The above verse was in many cards and notes that I received after losing my hubby. God's Word was truly comforting. I recorded many verses that I read over those days in a journal and I look back at them often, all the while writing new ones.
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Yesterday, O'Deller had a birthday, she turned two. I missed celebrating this with hubby by my side, signing my gift without his name next to mine and visiting with friends and family, feeling only half here. I took notice though of something through my grief .... my heart felt not quite as heavy. Strangely it was something I fought against accepting. As I have gone through my day though He continues to make it clear to me and here I am, being led by the Spirit to share it.
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It is a hard thing to describe....but I can tell you that I can feel a new level of comfort that may have been with me for awhile but I hadn't recognized it yet. All in God's timing though, all in His time. We yearn for these blessings yet can sometimes miss them if we let the world get in.
*****
The pain in my heart, my emotions were at one time VERY sharp. It would take my breath away, literally. I would be going through my day and a thought, picture, or sound would remind me of my sweet prince and the pain would pierce me. I would awake from a dream and have a lingering feeling of sadness, my heart was extremely heavy. Most days I wanted to shut reality out and not face my days without my hubby. An older and wiser widow shared this verse with me: "Fear not; for thou shalt not be ashamed: neither be thou confounded; for thou shalt not be put to shame: for thou shalt forget the shame of thy youth, and shalt not remember the reproach of thy widowhood any more. 5 For thy Maker is thine husband; the LORD of hosts is his name; and thy Redeemer the Holy One of Israel; The God of the whole earth shall he be called." Isaiah 54:4-5 Again, it is taking learning and leaning on God to believe and live this verse out in my life. He took my sweet prince to his Heavenly Home, but did not leave me husbandless nor my children fatherless, He tells me that He is there for me.
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"Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted" Matthew 5:4
****
The above verse was in many cards and notes that I received after losing my hubby. God's Word was truly comforting. I recorded many verses that I read over those days in a journal and I look back at them often, all the while writing new ones.
****
Yesterday, O'Deller had a birthday, she turned two. I missed celebrating this with hubby by my side, signing my gift without his name next to mine and visiting with friends and family, feeling only half here. I took notice though of something through my grief .... my heart felt not quite as heavy. Strangely it was something I fought against accepting. As I have gone through my day though He continues to make it clear to me and here I am, being led by the Spirit to share it.
*****
It is a hard thing to describe....but I can tell you that I can feel a new level of comfort that may have been with me for awhile but I hadn't recognized it yet. All in God's timing though, all in His time. We yearn for these blessings yet can sometimes miss them if we let the world get in.
*****
The pain in my heart, my emotions were at one time VERY sharp. It would take my breath away, literally. I would be going through my day and a thought, picture, or sound would remind me of my sweet prince and the pain would pierce me. I would awake from a dream and have a lingering feeling of sadness, my heart was extremely heavy. Most days I wanted to shut reality out and not face my days without my hubby. An older and wiser widow shared this verse with me: "Fear not; for thou shalt not be ashamed: neither be thou confounded; for thou shalt not be put to shame: for thou shalt forget the shame of thy youth, and shalt not remember the reproach of thy widowhood any more. 5 For thy Maker is thine husband; the LORD of hosts is his name; and thy Redeemer the Holy One of Israel; The God of the whole earth shall he be called." Isaiah 54:4-5 Again, it is taking learning and leaning on God to believe and live this verse out in my life. He took my sweet prince to his Heavenly Home, but did not leave me husbandless nor my children fatherless, He tells me that He is there for me.
***
The peace that He has sent me is again hard to explain in human terms.....Paul says it best in Philippians 4:7 "And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus" This peace which I can testify to is without human understanding....this peace is healing the pain of my heart. As the pain subsides I feel the joy and warmth of treasured and precious memories of my sweet prince - seeing his pictures are filling.....hearing stories of his youth are a wonderful balm of comfort - both still bring tears and I believe always will, but the pain is lessening, Praise be to God ♥
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I have learned many things on this journey, (and I know He is not through with me yet) the most important is the TRUTH of our God who is sovereign. In Psalm 73:26 David writes, "My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever." Should it be a surprise that God has strengthened my heart? No, because He does not lie. What a testimony He continues to be in my life. His promises are real and I am thankful, because I am so unworthy of His sustaining peace that He continues to shower upon me.
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2 comments:
Praise the Lord and AMEN!! AMEN!!
Your Words are so true and so
comforting.
Oh, the comfort of His word. I remember well sharing Matthew 5:4 with my oldest on our first Father's Day without Daddy. It gave him freedom to let out the grief he was keeping bottled in.
God's word is Truth and the Truth truly does set us free. Many hugs and thanks for sharing your heart.
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